legend of 1900

instrumental (piano)

SUDDENLY THEY ALL BECOME WARM

JOLO, SULU is a place where you easily get sunburn as the weather is really hot and humid.

Local and Zamboanga City based journalists including hired photographers and cameramen of local politicians as well as by the foreign and Filipino military here swarmed the place trying their best to get the best shot as US Ambassador Kristie Kenney and British Ambassador Peter Beckingham move around inspecting projects.

My height is no match to those photographers and cameramen so I decided to move back away from makeshift tent to have a better view.

As I was retreating, I heard a familiar voice calling my name.

I look back and there’s Major General Reuben Rafael, chief of Task Force Comet. He was smiling and making signal to approach him which I did.

He whispered a joke saying, “I heard you were banned by CSAFP, is that true?”

So I informed him straight face that I never heard General Esperon issuing such order but several officials confirmed that Brig. General Juancho Sabban issued directive to his junior officers in Basilan.

They know because they were among those who were given the instructions.

I said those words in front of Western Mindanao Command chief Major General Nelson Allaga and I even turned the tables then saying why not asked the chief here.

Allaga in turned smiles but turned a bit apologetic explaining why he was not able to answer my call last week.

“I saw your calls several times but I cannot answer because I was in Zamboanga del Sur during the visit of President Gloria Macapagal Arroyo,” Allaga explained.

I do understand Allaga because I knew Arroyo’s visit was September 16 and 17, besides Sabban’s reported banning me from coverage in Basilan was issued on September 18, 2007.

Even Brig. General Ruperto Pabustan, chief of Special Forces in Sulu who was reportedly mad at me because of the story I did about 8 minors subjected to psychological torture greeted me with a warm smile.

While we were talking, suddenly Esperon appeared behind so I immediately made myself scarce and continued my work.

During the Sulu Provincial Capitol activity, I intentionally cornered Esperon and interviewed him if indeed he issued such order as claimed by Sabban.

As far as I can remember, Sabban verbalized such claim to Major General Ben Dolorfino, the Philippine Marine Corps commandant in the morning of September 18, 2007 while they were having a closed door meeting at Tabiawan, Isabela City Basilan.

Dolorfino told me that it was Sabban who expressed that claim, “but I didn’t believe him (that Esperon could issue such order).”

So back to Esperon this is what he actually told me while I was doing my chance interview. We were all rushing for time so he granted an interview while we were proceeding inside Sulu National High School.

Esperon was smiling as usual and at first he told reporters that “Thank you, thank you.”

But I was a bit persistent so I asked him this question. “Sir, is it true I am banned?”

“Laugh… you cannot limit press freedom, then laugh, without losing it. It’s very basic in our democracy. I don’t know what report you have on that? Are you banned? No.”

Knowing Esperon for about 10 years and doing coverage while he was once a ground commander, he only got irked when I pursued the issue about how intelligent is the intelligence community of the AFP.

Esperon if he dislikes my stories, he never got to a point of banning me from coverage even during his term as 103^rd Army Brigade commander in Basilan in 2002.

FRUIT OF IMAGINATION

I read the CMFR report. I wanted to laugh when I read the portion of Sabban’s side where he claimed I need attention and dreaming up things.

First I don’t sleepwalk. I am not into day dreaming or suffering from lack of attention and I don’t think his junior officers under his so-called Thunder turf were also dreaming when they heard Sabban’s directive on September 18, 2007. I don’t think General Dolorfino was dreaming when Sabban informed him about the “banning order.”

I was not also dreaming when journalists and officers proceeded to the mess hall on September 18, 2007 when everyone was partaking Sabban’s prepared lunch and I was sitting in one of the couches facing him eating my own “baon” a bottled juice and chips.

If I was dreaming as Sabban claimed “pinakain pa namin siya” in one of interviews by Joel Guinto, probably my fellow journalists could have woken me up.

Roel Pareno of Philippine Star and Leila Vicente of ABS-CBN Zamboanga City were there to attest and witnessed that I didn’t take anything even a single drop of water from the mess hall of Thunder.

Pareno, Vicente and Major Minandang Macatoon (one of Sabban’s men) even repeatedly invited me to join them partaking the lunch which I politely turned down explaining them that I am still full and I am on a diet.

When Sabban claimed to Guinto that he fed me, that’s what you call dreaming things or “simpleng bagay na nga lang magsisinungaling pa.”

No harassment? For me its still harassment when his intelligence guys approached me and even inquired my relationship to the four year old boy.

I am not imagining or dreaming up things when we were at the third floor of the Golden Bell Commercial Center located along the Major Jaldon and Camins street in the afternoon of September 6, 2007.

I and my son were not imagining things when strangers approached me, played around and carried my son and later informed me that I was wanted by their commander (Sabban) and inquiring me who were my sources.

Lack attention? Why would I need attention? I am not a toddler like my 4 year old son that needs real attention and care.

I don’t need attention to publish my accomplishments so I will get promotion. I am very much contented with my life as journalist. They label me with names and as I said earlier, I don’t care with labels, call me leftist then fine, at least they can never label me “envelopmentalist” and I don’t contact influential people to settle problems.

In fact I live an ordinary life and I am satisfied with what I have, my son and my own home.

Inquirer reporter banned from Basilan coverage

September 21, 2007

A reporter of the Philippine Daily Inquirer has been banned by the military from covering its operations in the battle-scarred island province of Basilan, a report reaching Luwaran today. The reporter was identified as Julie S. Alipala, who drew the ire of the military for her reports on “military abuses and lapses in its operations”.

Philippine Marines commandant Major General Ben Dolorfino has confirmed that Zamboanga Inquirer correspondent Julie S. Alipala has been banned by the military from covering its operations in Basilan.

The report was received by the Media Safety Office of the National Union of Journalists of the Philippines and International Federation of Journalists.

Alipala wrote an article on the August 18 clash in Unkaya Pukan town in Basilan, where 15 Marines were killed by the Abu Sayyaf.

Since then, the report said, Alipala received threats and warned by colleagues to be extra careful.

Meanwhile, Khaled Musa, deputy chairman of the MILF Committee on Information, expressed his concern for the “arm-twisting approach” of the military, saying instead of banning Alipala, they should conduct an inquiry into the veracity of the reported abuses and lapses.

“It is good that there are still courageous media people out there who can say straight in the eye of the military that ‘they, are problems in your ranks in the field’”, he said.

He suggested that instead of banning and castigating the poor reporter, the military should investigate and if her report has no basis then she can be liable for libel and should be charged in court, but there is enough evidence of her report then she should be commended

He further commented that by banning Alipala will only strengthen her credential as a true journalist, who vowed to uphold the truth at all times, and on the other hand reinforces the perception that the military is hiding something from the public and has indeed committed that abuses and lapses.

AFP: Learning from Mistakes?

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Poor Planning, Troop Burnout Caused Twin Tragedy in By Julie S. Alipala in Zamboanga City Wednesday, 15 August 2007

Beheading in Basilan, however, is mainly political.

Tactical errors, lapses—these are now commonly used words in the Armed Forces of the Philippines—and they appear to be the most convenient excuses for the recent setbacks in Sulu and Basilan. (Click here to see the location of Basilan island through Google Maps.)

But our findings show that poor planning and tired troops are key factors in the military debacle.

A couple of weeks ago, the AFP blamed the death of 14 Marine soldiers (July 10, 2007) in Basilan to the wrong radio frequency because rescue forces couldn’t get their location. Ten of the 14 were mutilated and beheaded while 15 others were injured. The beheading, Newsbreak learned, was driven by political reasons. The Marines strictly enforced the gun ban before the elections and angered local politicians.

Later, the ambush on August 9 at Maimbung town in Sulu (click here to view location through Google Maps), wherein 10 Army soldiers were killed, was attributed to the failure to provide back-up security escorts. In a matter of days, casualties increased to a total of 27 soldiers killed and 12 wounded.

Armed Forces chief of staff Gen. Hermogenes Esperon Jr and Western Mindanao Command chief Lt. General Eugenio Cedo agree that tactical errors are the reasons for the heavy casualties of the military in these two provinces of the Autonomous Region in Muslim Mindanao (ARMM).

However, an Army colonel and a junior officer we talked to expressed dismay over the outcome of multi-million pesos worth of military operations. They blame the main planners and recommend stripping them of their star ranks. "The high error percentage is unacceptable given that this caused the lives of 42 soldiers in a span of 30 days," the Army officer said.

Both of our sources requested not to be identified because they are not authorized to speak on the issue.

The junior officer, with the rank of lieutenant, says military planners are likened to licensed engineers: "They conceive first the idea, then plan and map all factors such as safety, zoning of areas, logistics, supplies and resources, workers, funding and then construction. Once a mild crack is noticed on a structure, engineers may face serious consequences. This is investigated and if the engineers are found to have been reckless, their licenses are cancelled."

Unfortunately these procedures don't apply to the main planners of the AFP, the young lieutenant lamented.

Tactical Blunder

In 2005, the Panamao attack—where the military operation against the ASG dragged on for about 10 days—resulted in the death of about 40 soldiers and an officer, Colonel Dennis Villanueva.

However, according to an intelligence officer, "the margin of error in 2005 is quite acceptable because the operation lasted more than a week. But the error committed in the recent operation wherein 27 are dead within 10 hours is unimaginable. It's basically a tactical blunder."

The AFP has seen better days. In 2003, for example, soldiers captured Abu Sayyaf leaders Mujib Susukan and Galib Andang aka Kumander Robot in Sulu. A resident, Fatmawati Salapuddin, remembers it well: "It was very laudable as the AFP then conducted the operation quietly, they didn't employ thousands of troops and they didn't use high-powered artilleries and bombs and no one was displaced."

In Basilan last year, the military launched successful operations against the Abu Sayyaf, making them flee to the nearby island of Sulu.

Today, the AFP has sent more than 6,000 troops to pursue less then 500 armed elements in Sulu and Basilan.

Tired Troops

Weeks without rest are taking their toll on the soldiers.

Wilfreda Potoy, mother of slain Private First Class Rico Potoy, gunner of Bravo Company of the 33rd Infantry Battalion, received a text message from her eldest son on August 8, 2007 saying he's exhausted from their operation.

“Father, mother I am going home on August 12. I am very tired. Almost everyday, there's operation, morning, at night. We keep on operating 10 days straight, I want to rest," Rico said in his message.

Rico Potoy was among the 16 killed in an encounter on August 9 in Maimbung.

Wilfreda's youngest son, Private Astor "Jojo" Potoy Jr, also of 33rd IB confirmed that their unit operated without rest since the first of August.

Total battle casualties incurred in the August 8 and 9 encounters were 2. Twelve others were wounded of whom three are in critical condition.

Task Force Comet chief Maj. Gen. Reuben Rafael told Newsbreak that their enemies, combined Abu Sayyaf and "rogue" Moro National Liberation Front fighters, incurred 37 killed in action but only 10 bodies were recovered. Of the 10, only four were identified.

Widow Sara Hashim wife of slain Private First Class Daim Hashim, native of Jolo, told Newsbreak that her husband was a non-combatant. Sara, speaking in Filipino said, "My husband worked as carpenter of the 33rd Infantry Battalion, part of the non-operating troops.”

Hashim’s best friend, Private First Class Kaisar Hassan, who was also killed, was sort of an all-around personnel at the battalion, cleaning bunkers, weeding grasses, preparing coffee.

“They lacked people as everyone was in the operation,” Sara said.

How it Started

As early as August 2, Sulu Gov. Abdusakur Tan reported that several families were displaced in Indanan town due to renewed military campaign against the Abu Sayyaf Group. But the military kept mum about this.

Indanan field social worker Christopher Lee confirmed that on August 2, several residents scampered for safety seeing the arrival of soldiers "who later established positions in the communities, thus residents abandoned their houses for fear of being caught in the crossfire."

On August 7, two junior officers of the Marine Battalion Landing Team 11 were wounded in an Indanan clash. Still, officials of the Western Mindanao Command kept silent.

A day later, Comet chief Rafael confirmed the report in Indanan including the wounding of five others from the 33rd Infantry Battalion. One was killed, identified as Private First Class Stevencent Ballares.

"The Army troopers clashed with about 50 heavily armed Abu Sayyaf Group. We have recovered four dead from the Abu Sayyaf side," Rafael said.

However, Hatimil Hasan, interim vice chair of the MNLF sounded the alarm over the incident: “There are no members or leaders of the Abu Sayyaf killed, all those slain were bonafide members and commander of the MNLF Parang Municipal Command." Hasan identified the slain commander as Jeili Habbi, chair of MNLF Parang. A son and two other close-in security, all MNLF fighters, were killed.

MNLF Coddling Abu Sayyaf?

Apparently, the military suspects the MNLF of harboring ASG members.

Ustadz Habib Zain Jali, MNLF spiritual adviser, said he was informed by fighters on the ground that Habbi, the slain MNLF chair who is more than 60 years old, was roused from sleep early dawn, went out to inspect the surrounding, "along with his son and two others and as he opened the gate, a burst of fire greeted him."

"We lost seven comrades,” said Hasan, who is also concurrent speaker of the Legislative Assembly of the ARMM.

He revealed that prior to the August 8 attack, "soldiers in three truckloads encircled camp of Ustadz Khaid (Adjibun)," chair of the MNLF State Revolutionary Command based in Indanan.

Two wounded Army soldiers of the 33rd Infantry Battalion corroborated Hassan’s statements.

Private First Class Muhamil Hassan (not related to Hatimil Hasan) of the lead squad unit said that on the dawn of August 7, they were informed by their commander to execute a highly sensitive mission in Parang, Sulu. They jumped off before five o’clock in the morning of August 8 to the said area and Hassan was directed to lead an advance unit.

"Our mission was to go after Albader Parad and Doktor Abu (who are Abu Sayyaf) but when we arrived, it was the MNLF," Hassan said but quickly added that "the Abu Sayyaf and MNLF may have combined forces because that’s what’s been talked about."

Private First Class Abdulhari Bittong, a native of Parang, admits he was briefed about the mission but was unaware of the objective.

Bittong said that when they reached their destination, "I was surprised because it was the house of MNLF Commander Jeili. The rebels were in ambush position, then there was an exchange of gunfire, at close range. We were about 20 meters from the rebels, that’s why I know who we were fighting against."

When Bittong asked why he knew some of his targets and the slain commander, he said that he used to be with them since he is an integree, one of the former MNLF fighters who joined the AFP.

Commander Jeili is known in the community and maintained several fighters.

MNLF Not Demobilized

"The military violated the peace agreement,” Hassan said. “They attacked camps of the MNLF in Indanan and Parang and it's our right to defend our territory."

Hasan confirmed that the Bangsamoro Army was responsible for the August 9 ambush on government troops in Maimbung initially resulting in 10 killed and one wounded.

"We can’t accept that we are being attacked by the AFP, we don’t know what their objective is," Adjibun said after a series of dialogues initiated by the AFP and MNLF ground commanders.

From August 2 to 6, troops of Task Group Philippine Marine Corps along with Joint Special Operations Force encircled Indanan forcing the MNLF to abandon their last and recognized territory.

On August 8, 2007 elements of 33rd Infantry Battalion raided the house of MNLF Parang Chair Jeili Habbi. Habbi and three other MNLF fighters were killed.

Before that, MNLF commander Ustadz Habier Malik declared jihad on April 13 against the Armed Forces when he got confirmation that troops of Joint Special Operations under Col. Ruperto Pabustan were responsible for the death of a teenager on February 19, 2007 in Indanan.

The teenager turned out to be the grandson of an MNLF commander who was killed in a declared "free fire zone" area of Indanan.

However, Pabustan insisted the boy was an Abu Sayyaf: "Why on earth was he there late that night if he is not a bandit. He was killed in a legitimate encounter."

But a probe conducted by the Commission on Human Rights showed that the boy was with another male companion on their way home after watching a TV soap opera.

In late April, 2nd Marine Brigade commander Col. Ceasario Atienza took control of Camp Jabal Uhod of the MNLF in Panamao.

Basilan: Marines vs Politicians

In Basilan, it’s different. Some link the Sulu tragedy to Basilan's carnage but reasons for the clashes differ.

While the MILF admitted they ambused the Marines in July—who were then searching for the kidnapped Italian priest—they said that they did not behead the soldiers.

The reasons for the beheading of the Marines are mainly political. An independent investigation by a group of foreign and Filipino women organized by the Global Partnership for the Prevention of Armed Conflict-Southeast Asia (GPPAC-SEA) and the Mindanao Peace Weavers (MPW) showed that “issues related to politics are among the factors that contributed to the deterioration of peace and security in the island province."

Newsbreak learned that the beleaguered unit of the Philippine Marines during the July 10 incident in Albarka town earned a reputation as the most stringent unit when it comes to gun ban enforcement.

The slain soldiers were actively involved in enforcing the firearm ban, according to Lt. Col. Felix Almadrones who heads the Marine unit deployed to confiscate loose firearms.

The Marines started to implement the gun ban in April, as mandated by the Commission on Elections, in the run up to the May 14 election.

The Marines reported that assorted firearms were apprehended from politicians but identities were not indicated. In April and May, the unit confiscated several firearms and rounds of ammunition reportedly owned by politicians in the area.

In July 5, the unit encountered suspected members of the Abu Sayyaf Group and recovered one more firearm.

No Sacred Cows

Local officials attest to the dedication and determination of the Marine Battalion Landing Team 8 (MBLT8), headed by Almadrones, in trying to clean the province of loose firearms that have been the cause of lawlessness and banditry for a long time.

Lamitan City Mayor Roderick Furigay said the sincerity of the said unit is indisputable. “They didn’t have sacred cows. If anyone violated the law, whoever he or she was, they were treated equally."

Basilan Bishop Martin Jumoad said that "they were very faithful to their work, they were just following orders and doing their mission and were known as uncompromising against illegal activities."

Jumoad said the unit was firm in their campaign against loose firearms. “They arrested and seized guns even if they belonged to the followers of influential politicians like Gerry Salapuddin or Wahab Akbar."

Naval Forces Western Mindanao Command chief Rear Admiral Emilio Marayag said that "our soldiers in Basilan were able to apprehend more firearms in just a span of four months in the area compared to other units that have been assigned to this island for more than three years."

Party-list Rep. Mujiv Hataman (Anak-Mindanao) confirmed that Almadrones’ unit "was very rigid in performing their mission they were not afraid to disarm politicians or followers of politicians before and after the election."

Trace the Root Cause

Hataman believes that the root cause of the conflict "boils to one thing, the proliferation of loose firearms. The government's efforts to address this and personnel engaging in this campaign always end up in tragic incidents, relieved or demoted."

In 2001, Army personnel of 103rd Army Brigade also implemented the gun ban campaign. Hataman recalled that more firearms were recovered inside the Provincial Capitol Office when the governor was Wahab Akbar, now a congressman, and the Army official then was Col. Jovenal Narcise.

"Other than growing animosity, there was legal battle between the governor and the army official," Hataman said but the difference was, "Narcise didn't coordinate with his higher official while the Marines had prior coordination and they properly turned over the apprehended firearms to their higher officials."

"It's like rido (vengeance) against uniformed personnel, where armed groups tried to avenge their losses," Hataman said.

Rear Admiral Marayag suggested that the "Commission on Audit should conduct a probe on politicians like Akbar. He should explain how he was able to acquire firearms: are they government firearms or does he buy them using his own money?"

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fighting addiction

I just quit smoking, yes I did! Yet for four days now, I started puffing the white long and slim stick.

I don’t know why it’s so difficult to stop this bad habit from my system.

I am not just addicted to nicotine, I also enjoy savoring the super black caffeine not just every morning, but round the clock sipping.

For quite sometime, I have been fighting this addiction.

As much as possible I make myself free from tension even at work. I make sure that lighter and cigarette are no longer part of my bag’s accessories.

If there are friends smoking in my presence, I distanced myself so I cannot inhale the smoke or I’ll be tempted to ask for a stick.

If craving is getting stronger, I fight it out by doing other things like fixing or repairing broken toys, weeding out the backyard, playing with my son or picking Sampaguita flowers at my mother’s front yard.

It has almost been out off my system when suddenly, I find myself inhaling smoke, one stick to another, then another stick, then another one until I finished one whole pack within 24 hours.

Smoking also increases my caffeine intake, so I ended up sipping and puffing throughout the day, for almost five days now.

I told myself that this will be the last, but that’s always the case.

I think I should follow my old routine, one stick after every meal or free smoke at daytime.

In that routine, I managed to quit my bad habit for about 10 years until I met my ex-hubby, a chain smoker then.

But to set a timeframe is another thing. Maybe I should start today, or tomorrow? Maybe later…I don’t know, but what is sure for now, I am ready to quit.

HE LOVES SCHOOL

I woke early and remember that it’s Monday, Kenneth’s first day in school.

Feeling like a high school student again, I rushed to the bathroom, prepare all the meals and hastily clean the house.

Soon I woke him up and he was smiling when I carried him to the dining room, “Kenjo school na, breakfast na and bath agad.”

He seriously obliged to my words and he ate fast so he could join me in my bath.

We arrived early in his school, the three elderly women, adviser, principal and the finance officer were already there as well as the two teachers.

He greeted them good morning and left me with the elder women as he proceeded towards the seesaw.

Teacher Michelle followed him and later I heard them both laughing and talking.

It’s good to be early because Kenneth was able to adjust in the surroundings.

Other classmates came in quite late and soon I heard blocks and toys fell down from their tables.

Others were crying looking for their mothers or nannies.

Kinder one class only lasts for three hours everyday, but for Kenneth, “masyadong madali lang ang klase namin,” as he wants to stay longer in school to draw and play.

I just realized that bringing Kenneth to school once in a while before opening of classes is a good thing.

Seeing his new environment together with children of his age is something enlivening for him other than what he encounters inside our home.

Kenneth grew up in my world where computer, cellular phone, facsimile, television and radio news make my life complete.

Tips for mothers having first timer kiddie in school:

• Find out the nearest community school, distance makes children restless in travel and burdensome.
• Check background of teachers and administrators then ask around especially from mothers whose kids enrolled in the said school.
• Inspect the facility and make sure the structure is designed for children’s safety.
• Before enrolling your kid, bring him or her to the school and try to get reaction, find out if the child likes the environment.
• If feedback is overwhelmingly positive, then enroll your child.
• Be early for the first day of class, not just to make an impression but for children’s familiarization.
• Children upon seeing more strangers other than their teachers or security guards are quite afraid or shy.

KENNETH IS GOING TO SCHOOL

Few years back, I was just coddling a little angel in my arms.

His eyes were simply reacting to peoples’ voices, noises and music as his arms stretching up, reaching out to feeding bottle and anything colorful.

I remember at his infancy stage, he cried out loud when he was in pain or hungry, he threw his feeding bottle if he was mad, he closed his eyes when he was afraid of something and laughed out loud when he was happy.

A couple of years passed and this little angel started to run after puppies and cats and trying to catch colorful butterflies.

He is also catching up with words not just Mama, Lola, Tita, Tito, Kuya or Ate but words like flowers, dogs, mineral water, milk, thank you, good night, sweet dreams and a lot more.

Humming a familiar tune from a television commercial and popularized by Donna Cruz surprised us, but what shocked us most when he can sing the whole stanza with correct lyrics.

“Ang gabing payapa lahat ay tahimik… pati mga tala sa bughaw na langit…”

At the early age, my mother said that my angel will become a popular singer or a musician, “wag lang mapabayaan ang kanyang talento.”

Yet he loves my pampering, carrying him like an infant, feeding him with solid foods and helping him to bath.

A year passed and he is helping my mother to clean the surroundings by picking up dried Talisay leaves and plastics.

Assertive and very vocal, this little angel started to show his dominancy but still all his demands are subject to negotiation.

Once hooked with his favorite television show at Nickelodeon like Backyardigans, he cannot be lured to take his meals or noontime nap.

He loves compromises, allowing him to watch the shows for an hour or two and afterwards, he will personally put off the television, get his favorite pillows and on his own he will go to sleep.

Today, he woke up early, took his earliest breakfast made of cereals and milk, took his bath and dressed for school.

Kenneth is now going to school, of course with Mama assisting him.

What inspired me is that Kenneth is very excited to be in school.

All laughs and talks along the way as his school is just within the community where three elder women, all retired school teachers are running the facility for humanitarian reasons.

Once he got in and met his Teacher Michelle, he almost forgot that Mama is around and waiting outside the school.

He was so engrossed in building blocks, drawing books and meeting new friends.

My once little angel is now growing up as a fine young boy and soon more challenges will come along the way.

therapy for kenneth?

Kenneth is growing up gracefully. Yes, really graceful as he starts declaring openly that “I wanted to be a girl than a boy!”

At four years old, he speaks his mind boldly and doesn’t care if he hurts anybody or in return, he’ll be ridiculed by his kiddie peers.

Once, I tagged him along in one of my downtown trips to pay our monthly bills. We went to one of a service providers’ office, it was almost Holy Week break so the billing office was so crowded and we stand for an hour to be attended by a teller-cashier.

Suddenly a friend journalist approached and greeted me. Our casual conversation was diverted to my son’s behavior.

He was dancing amidst the crowd and doesn’t care if people were laughing at him.

I don’t know what to do then. People might think that my son is a special child as he is making faces and noises showing his decayed teeth.

So I called his attention, “Kenneth, stop it please, people here don’t want noise.”

Everyone was stunned and then later laughed again when they heard Kenneth’s replies saying, “Mama please call me Kimberly, I don’t like the name Kenneth, okay?”

My friend journalist could hardly control his amusement.

“Julz, you should bring your son to a psychiatrist or else you’ll have problems with him later,” says my homophobic friend.

I was trying to control my emotion then as I dearly loved to slap his face in public.

One time I got mad when Kenneth was peeing mimicking the male dog.

He explained that he just wanted to feel how dogs urinate from one wall to another.

“Sinubukan ko lang kung mahirap kasi kanina pa yung dog ihi nang ihi sa bakod paikot-ikot hanggang dun sa puno.”

So I told him in an angry tone that “next time I’ll see you peeing like a dog I will really cut your penis.”

But I was shocked with his answer, “hay salamat, mawawala na ang penis ko.”

I am deeply aware that my son is growing up as gay and he is not a typical person trying to hide his preferred sex.

Although I keep explaining him that even if he removed his penis (as this is what he wanted) he’ll remain a male forever as God is the One that bestowed his gender.

“If I die and I live again on green planet (Earth) do you think God and Papa Jesus will already make me a girl?”

That is always his difficult question if he’s cornered with ended answer as “wala ka nang magagawa anak dahil pinanganak kang lalaki.”

Kenneth at his age is probably exploring everything, maybe at age 6 he’ll soon realize that he is indeed a boy. Whatever choice he’ll make someday, I will always support him.

signing on!!!

Ang tagal kong nawala! Halos di ko na alam kung saan magsisimula. I even forgot how to sign in in my own blogspot. Since January till present I have been pre-occupied with nothing, wala lang...
I just got tired or maybe I don't have enough time to sit and update my blog. Especially since January this year I decided to let my nanny go and look for a greener pasture. She's been with me acting as second mom to my son for almost four years. My son is growing up and he needs to be more independent, hindi sa lahat ng oras ay may yayang sumusunod. Ang hirap maging solo parent, now that Kenneth starts to ask so many questions and he speaks his own mind. Unlike before, I always do the talking and thinking, ngayon hindi na.

Actually December 2006 was the most busiest for me. Oy! Hindi ako nang-aginaldo ha! Me pinagawang assignment one of the fellow journalist which I have failed to complete dahil sinabayan ba naman ng events tulad ng pagkamatay ni Kadaffy Janjalani, the Nicole and Smith, US Ambassador Kenney's frequent trips to Sulu.

Dagdag dito, last December din when I received news from Carol Arguillas that I'm nominated for Peace Journalism Summer Course at Sydney, Australia kaya I was also busy preparing all my travel documents.

Anyway am back and with jest to write anew. This time more sharing on parenting and my exciting discoveries kung paano magpalaki ng isang Juniorita.